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“That is not it at all,

That is not what I meant, at all.”

--T.S. Eliot, The Lovesong of J. Alfred Prufrock

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The Awesome Power of Procrastination

*Trigger Warning: self-harm The power of procrastination is so awesome that even though I have been without Internet access for several hours and I have things that I think I want to do, I have spent that time lying on top of my bed thinking about how I would do all the things I want to do if I were to do them. Very productive. I think that the ideas I have are worth so much more in my head, I can fetishize every negative feeling and pretend that it makes me special or interesting in some way. But when the thoughts become words that I type out and read back, I realise how banal everything about me is. That's probably the real reason writing blog posts and writing in my journal gets a little harder every time. Here is a quick list of the things I should be doing right now: On Tuesday I had a very intense dream that was terrifying enough to make me feel slightly separate from my body all week. Even now, everything feels a little unreal and abnormal; I haven't stopped
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The Mad Girl wants a boyfriend

Having been inspired by Matthew Gray Gubler's cute(if somewhat unstructured) poem, I decided to write my own version, which is really just his poem with my own requirements in the place of his.

Boyfriend wanted

Must love decorating for the holidays
mischief
kissing in cars
and old books

no specific height
weight
hair colour
or political affiliation required
but would prefer a warm spirited non racist

theists
sexists
critics
and “stick in the muds” need not apply

cynics
pessimists
and nihilists are, however, welcome

a love for voluptuous figures a plus

any similarity in look, mind set, or, fashion sense to
Neil DeGrasse Tyson
Carl Sagan
Spencer Reid
or the 10th Doctor wholeheartedly welcome

I am dubious of actors, felons and models
but dont want to rule them out entirely

must be tolerant of singing
tickle torture
Edgar Allan Poe
and sleeping very late

I have slightly crooked teeth
eerily small feet
and a preternatural love of thunderstorms

I wiggle my feet in my sleep
am partial to the dark
and think Muse is one of the
greatest bands of
all time

all I want is
butterfly kisses in the morning
chocolate chip cookies shaped like hearts
and to make you smile until it hurts

Girlfriend wanted - Matthew Gray Gubler

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